Kris Foster Feels Unappreciated and Jeymi Noguera Feels Abandoned: Who’s Right in Their Relationship?

On last weekend’s episode of 90 Day Fiance: The Other Way, we heard two versions of a story.

Kris Foster described feeling unappreciated. A “shocked” Jeymi Noguera felt that Kris had abandoned her.

Both wives love each other, but they have a lot of hurt feelings. Both are hearing advice telling them that the other is in the wrong.

But … which of them is right?

Kris Foster and Jeymi Noguera genuinely love each other. But their relationship red flags did not evaporate when they met, or when they married.

Kris ghosted Jeymi before, when they were communicating remotely. Meanwhile, she had found Jeymi to be “clingy” at times.

Meeting in person for the first time. Marrying was a profoundly happy moment. But those past troubles were just foreshadowing.

As viewers watched on Season 4, Episode 12, Kris opened up to her mother about her marital problems.

By this point, she had been back home in Alabama for five months. That’s about five times as long as she and Jeymi spent together after marrying, if we recall correctly.

Sure, “two weeks” was probably never realistic considering what Kris had to get done. But after five months, it cannot have only been work. She was there because she and Jeymi were having issues.

In the words of Kris’ mother, both of them are “drama queens.” She wasn’t so sure if their personalities make for a good marriage.

But what was the actual underlying issue?

According to Kris, it was really about money. Kris was working hard to make money, taking odd jobs in Alabama for extra cash. Extra cash that she was sending to Jeymi.

And because of that, Kris felt like Jeymi was not appreciating her at all.

See, Jeymi was not working. As they both mentioned, Jeymi had taken time off from work when Kris first moved there. When work demanded that she return immediately, Jeymi quit — with Kris’ blessing.

At the time, they had an understanding that Jeymi would find new work, and Kris would cover a lot of expenses in the mean time. While Kris did pay a lot of bills (including the rent for three months after she returned to Alabama), Jeymi’s lack of progress with the job seemed to slow Kris’ financial contributions.

Clearly, there is a lot of resentment going on. Jeymi resents Kris’ time away, Kris resents Jeymi’s dependence on her.

(And, obviously, this is also contributing to a breakdown of communication within the marriage much more than the distance alone is)

Kris’ mother observed that she was acting like a “sugar mama” with Jeymi as her “kept woman.”

One moment that really stuck with Kris was how Jeymi had become angry after she had sent her $1,000.

Now, obviously, that is not enough to pay the bills for an entire month. It likely would not even cover a month’s rent.

But Kris felt used and frustrated that her wife was so financially and emotionally dependent on her. As far as Kris was concerned, staying in Alabama to work was the best option.

Meanwhile, Jeymi felt totally abandoned by her wife.

It wasn’t just that Kris was gone. Kris was working and sending her money — not as much as before, but some.

She also did not always respond to messages, was not always available to take calls. And when they did speak, they would too frequently argue.

When Jeymi brought her friend, Alex, up to speed, he could not resist a “told you so.” And, to be fair, he absolutely did tell her so.

Jeymi did offer some nuance in her account. After all, Kris could not work in Colombia, but she could work in Alabama.

But the plan had previously been that she and Jeymi would open a business together. A risky investment? Maybe. But they could earn money together.

We don’t know how viable an American-Venezuelan food truck would be in Bogota, Colombia. But it would be their project.

And Jeymi had not had success with her job search.

That was tragically not a surprise. She is of Venezuelan origins, which apparently leads to a lot of employers not even considering her.

Jeymi acknowledged that her choices — quitting her old job, unilaterally picking out a more expensive apartment — had played a role in their financial situation.

But she just wanted her wife to come back home to her.

The financial issues, the disagreements, were something that they could handle together. If they ever saw each other again.

So, who was right? We have seen 90 Day Fiance couples with one clear villain and a partner who is not. And we have also seen couples where they are both villains, a toxic couple who could never be happy together.

That’s not these two. Neither Kris nor Jeymi has everything right, or everything wrong. They are two people who love each other, and have different priorities.

You know who’s really right? Kris’ mom. Like her, we’re not sure if two people this prone to drama should really be married. Love by itself is not enough.