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During Season 4, Episode 14 of 90 Day Fiance: The Other Way, multiple couples broke up.
One of those splits came from Jen Boecher and Rishi Singh. Surprisingly, it did not come from Rishi dumping Jen after his family insisted that she could never be his bride.
Instead, it was Jen who handed him back his ring.
Even before that, she expressed worries that Rishi was “delusional” as he sounded overly optimistic about their future together.
At the beginning of the episode, Jen was hanging out with her friends, Myra and Randi. They were seeking relief from the heat of Indian summer.
None of them knew that Rishi’s mother and uncle had privately told him that Jen could never be his bride. It wasn’t how they found out, either.
Jen and Rishi’s age gap would not have changed by August 2 at 4 PM, no matter what the astrologer said. And Rishi feels beholden to his mother.
When Rishi came over, Randi and Myra excused themselves. They were going shopping, and Jen and Rishi needed one-on-one time.
This would be their first real talk after Rishi learned that his mother and uncle won’t even entertain the idea of blessing his relationship with Jen, let alone his desire to marry her.
Jen still thought that things were mostly fine. She’d noticed one major red flag.
And Rishi felt so, so anxious to tell Jen the truth.
Part of his hesitation was that he knew that this would hurt Jen as much as it had hurt him.
But there was another issue at play: Rishi’s unwillingness to simply ignore his family’s desire to control his life.
Jen brought up Rishi’s family’s obvious desire for him to live in the household. She had heard, through the translator, about how his family expects a “blended” family living situation.
For many understandable reasons, she had absolutely no desire to live that way.
Jen admitted that it sounded “like prison.” And given that Rishi’s family imagines his wife as an unpaid servant who helps his mother do chores around the house, that’s not far off.
So Jen brought it up.
Her big worry was that, for Rishi’s mother, this would be a dealbreaker.
Because, again, Jen wants to move to India and marry Rishi for love. Not to be a servant. That’s a different thing.
Rishi was almost comically quick to assure Jen — or try to — that Jen not wanting to become Cinderella was no big deal.
He told her that they could just live nearby if she wished. That he could divide his time between their home and his family responsibilities, so that Jen could have her privacy and personal space.
That sounded great! Perhaps too good to be true.
To the confessional camera, Jen expressed exactly how she felt in that moment.
“I’m worried that he’s completely delusional,” she remarked.
Even based upon the very polite conversation that she had, there is just no way that his mom would be okay with Jen and Rishi having their own phone.
In fact, as Rishi revealed more and finally admitted that his family rejects Jen, it only becomes weirder that Rishi was so upbeat about the living arrangements.
See, Rishi’s mother and uncle had asked about Jen’s age.
She is in her late 40s. That makes her sixteen years older than Rishi.
In real life, a 16-year age gap isn’t really that big of a deal if the younger person is in their thirties. That is the case with Rishi.
(If the younger person is 19, yeah, it’s weirder. Not illegal, but weirder)
But in the minds of Rishi’s family, it was a total dealbreaker. In particular because Jen is the one who is older. Gender roles brainrot strikes again, we see.
Rishi’s family told him “no.”
And, as he painfully confessed, he was unwilling to take a stand for his own happiness and go against them.
Jen was the one who took the next step, removing her engagement ring and handing it back to Rishi.
There was always this hope that Rishi would, if push came to shove, choose Jen and happiness over parental control.
Rishi dashed that hope.
Jen really, really wished that he’d found out if this age gap would be a dealbreaker before he proposed. They spent three years engaged … only for Jen’s immutable age to offend his mom.
Rishi sounded despondent.
He cried, while Jen felt so upset that she had lapsed into numbness.
Rishi expressed that he did not feel ready to lose Jen. But, short of standing up for himself against his family, what could he do?
Maybe they’ll pull through at the last minute.
There have been multiple indications that this was not the end.
But it’s hard to see how they can overcome this obstacle.
#Jen #Boecher #Worries #Rishi #Delusional #Ahead #Painful #Breakup
